Forget Sleazy Sales (Part 1 of 3): Why we need to take a closer look at "Bro Marketing"
How do you practice ethical AND effective marketing in 2021?
Part 1: Why we need to take a closer look at "Bro Marketing"
When you hear the words “bro marketing”, an image probably pops into your head:
A young white guy standing in front of a) a fancy car, b) a private plane, or c) an amazing mansion.
The FB ad copy underneath this image says something along the lines of
“Grab the Easy Sales Blueprint that helped me make $197,989 in just 23 hours”.
When you click through to the landing page, there’s a countdown timer at the top, and the bold, bright red text above the Buy button screams that you need to act NOW, or the seemingly reasonable $17 price will explode back up to the *ahem* “true” value of this offer: $9997.
So much of that feels desirable, you might be thinking about taking the plunge…
If it weren’t for the fact that something about it feels a bit gross. There’s no recognition of the privilege that played a part in getting him what he’s got, but there’s an ample dose of, “If you don’t take me up on this, you’re the fool.”
Overnight success? It’s attractive! Not real, but…
Getting a great deal? Who doesn’t love that? When the deal is on something you actually want.
FOMO? Duh. We all know bad things happen when timers hit zero.
Have you ever seen a movie where something good happens when the timer runs out? Me neither.
The messaging suggests that you’re an idiot not to take The Bro up on their offer—after all, that 39-page PDF is all that stands between you and your very own mansion—hot wife not included.
👆 This is “bro marketing”— and these 👇 are the “sleazy marketing techniques” that everybody & their business coach are currently positioning themselves against:
Authority manufactured by signalling privilege (cf Kelly Diels)— this is why you’ve got to rent the biggest, fanciest Airbnb you can find
A “silver bullet” solution: If he could make that $$$ in less time than it takes to re-watch a season of 24, surely you can too?
Fake urgency—what really happens when the timer gets to 00:00:00?
Fake scarcity: As if there’s not another bro clone coming about 5 scrolls down your feed
Fake value: If this offer is really “worth” $9997, where are the people who paid that price for it? (To quote Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: “Anyone? Anyone?”)
Note: In some countries, it’s actually illegal to assign a $$$ value to something you haven’t actually sold at that price.
Here’s the thing:
If you’re reading this, I’m going to assume the following:
You’re an online business owner
who wants to DO BETTER when it comes to ethically marketing your own products and services.
With the online education industry projected to be valued at $315+ Billion by 2025 (!!!), it’s a very exciting time to be selling your expertise online.
At the same time, if your Instagram feed looks anything like mine, you know:
We’re in the midst of a reckoning when it comes to the tactics that are used to sell online today.
That Bro Marketer I described above?
I’ve rarely ever seen an ad like that. (Though I have seen Rachael Kay Albers’ Braggy Bro video 👇)
I’ve had an ad blocker installed since 2012 and have made a conscious effort to only follow women in the online space (other than Ramit Sethi, whom I adore). I never signed up for ClickFunnels and I’m extremely picky about whose advice I’ll take about running my online biz.
But even so, I know exactly what the mythical Bro Marketer “looks like” because that’s the version of “unethical marketing” we’ve been rallying against for the last few years:
(Carolyn Herfurth provides this definition of “bro” in her Bro’ Dictionary)
AND YET—therein lies the problem:
When you think about “that Bro”, you don’t see yourself as part of the equation.
Bro Marketing Tactics become something someone else does, not something you – and I, btw – did / have done / very likely are still doing.
This isn’t your fault!
To paraphrase many other women having this conversation (Kelly Diels, Michelle Mazur, Rachael Kay Albers, Tarzan Kay, Maggie Patterson & Hillary Weiss to name a few—all of whom I’ll reference further in the course of this blog post series):
Bro Marketing is the water we’re all swimming in, it’s the air we all breathe.
You may not think you’re using the same sales tactics as a bro marketer, but odds are, you’re learning from someone who learned from the same person who taught those bro marketers everything they know (cf. Dr Michelle Mazur):
So when you position yourself as NOT using any of “those sleazy bro marketing techniques”...
Or when you’re attracted to the marketing of someone who positions themselves that way…
You're participating in the illusion that there’s a good vs evil as far as marketing is involved, when the truth is there’s a whole lot of grey.
There’s more to this conversation than The Bros vs Everybody else.
Here’s why that grey zone matters:
“Bro Marketing” isn’t just about the Bros:
In fact, white women in particular are a HUGE part of the problem. (See Kelly Diels for a 10-part series on the weapons and impact of a Female Lifestyle Empowerment Brand).Bro-y behaviour has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with putting sales before service when it comes to your relationship with the people who give you money.
The tactics we identified above as being Bro Marketing Trademarks are all based on the behavioural triggers described by Dr Robert Cialdinis’ “weapons of influence” in his book Influence.
These social triggers include:Reciprocity: “You gave me something, so I owe you something”
Commitment & Consistency: “I said it, so I believe it”
Social Proof: “If they say so…”
Liking: “I like her so I’ll buy her thing”
Authority: “I want to buy from someone smart”
Scarcity: “I don’t want to miss out—especially if everyone else is doing it
Problem is:
On their own, the “triggers” outlined above are both neutral and necessary.
As Cialdini says, if we had to make every decision without using any of these shortcuts, “we would stand frozen—cataloging, appraising, and calibrating—as the time for action sped by and away.”Taking these triggers out of your marketing is a bit like de-clawing your cat—it seems like it’ll result in LESS pain, but it’s actually an excruciating process.
Yes, you can sell without being sleazy.
Yes, there are undoubtedly people who are using these tactics for evil
And YES, change is 100% necessary for us to shift towards business practices that are equitable, anti-racist, and just.
But I’m passionate about helping women get the biggest impact possible from the work they’re already doing.So I can’t sit back and watch while they delete their Deadline Funnel accounts or refuse to employ proven persuasive techniques—especially because we NEED women to make more money if we want to change the world—and currently, only 2% of women-owned businesses break the million-dollar mark.
If you’ve got an offer that genuinely helps your audience, you can and should make use of social triggers in your marketing!
You just need to be transparent about the process and ethical in your intentions.
If you’re still here, I know this to be true:
You want to make sales—ethically.
And by now, you might agree with me that doing so means doing MORE than not being a bro. But you don’t yet have a clear understanding of what the alternative looks like instead—you feel as stuck on your sales copy now as you felt before.
In the next post in this 3-part series, I’ll list the practices I’ve seen and heard of as associated with “bro marketing” or “unethical marketing” and dig into some existing recommendations for alternative methods of marketing. [Click through here to read Part 2: Forget sleazy sales. These are the 5 personality traits of an empathetic personal brand]
Finally, I’ll share my take (& specific tips) on how to use ethical AND effective marketing practices to scale your online biz—’cause you DON’T have to feel filthy just because you have a funnel.
Dedicated to de-sleazing your sales copy? Stay tuned for Part 2 in this 3-part series.
I share my take on how to address pain points from a place of empathy (rather than shame) in The “What hurts?” Sales Page Framework ( ← shameless plug for my own “non-sleazy” process for writing a sales page that converts ;) )
Grab The Sales Page Power Hour to get your hands on:
My RCA Sales Page Flow (incl. a Google doc template that makes it easier than ever to make my flow your own)
My system for repurposing your sales page content— without sacrificing freshness or platform relevance
A pre-publication sales page checklist that covers your copy, your design & your tech (and so much more!)